Travel Baseball Is Not Just About Getting What You
Want
Learning self-evaluation and teaching your
kid the right life lesson is the best path.
By Steve Smull
of LVBA
Blog Article #1
To be fair, I should not limit this article to just
baseball parents. A parent who has kids in any
sport often struggles to understand what is happening on the field.
“Why did the coach take my kid out?”
“Why is my kid not playing shortstop?”
“Why is my kid not batting 3rd or 4th
in the lineup? He has always batted 3rd or 4th.”
“Ok, I am going to give that coach a piece of my mind.”
Raise your hands if you have had those thoughts while
watching a game.
I will now attempt to help the reader understand how you
can help your kid develop to be a better baseball (or basketball, soccer, etc.)
player and more importantly, a better person. And I will conclude with how you
should approach a coach or organization owner when you have a multitude of questions
that you need answered.
I will attempt to help you by passing on a story that
Dylan Dando, owner and Director of Baseball Operations at Lehigh Valley
Baseball Academy, relayed to me involving his 7-year old daughter playing
soccer in a local rec league.
Dando went on to talk about how his daughter was not
happy about the amount of playing time she was getting and she wanted him to
talk to the coach about getting her more playing time.
Sound familiar?
What is not “familiar” was Dando’s approach to that
situation.
Dando explained to his daughter that he was not going to
talk to the coach about getting her more playing time. He felt that her only playing
half the game was appropriate.
He went on to explain to her that if she wants more
playing time, then she should be more focused on what she is doing on the
soccer field when she is playing and be more focused on the game when
she is sitting. He also explained to her that she needs to practice more at
home to improve her soccer skills because he never sees her practicing on her
own.
Dando admitted that she is more interested in the social
aspect of playing soccer with her friends and that her number one priority with
playing soccer (besides socializing) was to have fun.
And there is nothing wrong with that. Let kids be kids.
But Dando was not going to approach the coach about
getting his daughter more playing time just because she wanted more playing
time.
“No way”, Dando said. “I told her she has to earn her
playing time. I would be teaching her the wrong life lesson to go to the coach
to get her more playing time just because she wants that and just because I can
make that happen for her.”
“And therein lies the problem with parents everywhere,”
Dando continued. “A lot of these travel baseball parents teach their kids the
wrong lesson by jumping from one travel program to another to another because
their kid is not getting enough playing time or not playing the position they
want their kid to play or not batting in the spot in the batting order they
want their kid to bat.”
“Parents at LVBA forget that I am a parent, too,” Dando
said. “I have two kids who play sports and I handle the kids at the academy the
same way I handle my two kids. If my kids or the academy kids are not on the
field as much as they think they should be, then do something to make yourself better
and earn more playing time. Focus more at practice. Do more work at home. Get
additional instruction. Do the things you need to do to get better and get on
the field more.”
However, parents would rather blame the coach or the
organization instead of looking at their kid’s situation honestly.
“Parents just automatically point the finger at the coach
or the organization,” Dando said. “Parents don’t even consider the possible
reasons their kid is not on the field as much as they think their kid should
be. Parents do not ask themselves how they can help improve the situation. They
just point the finger at the coach or the organization and often times leave
the organization to go somewhere else where they can play more. And that is not
the answer.”
“A big problem with the world today is that most people
cannot self-evaluate,” Dando said. “They just cannot look into the mirror and
admit their mistakes. And most baseball parents are incapable of evaluating
their own kids honestly. They are not honest about what they see on the field.”
One of the most important points that I took from the conversation
was when Dando said this:
“Sure, LVBA develops players by giving them tons of reps
in the infield and outfield, throwing pens, getting thousands of reps in the
batting cage and going over situational spots constantly with hitting and
fielding, but we also develop the kids to make them better people by teaching
them the right life lessons,” Dando said. “And those life lessons include
earning your playing time on the field.”
In conclusion, another important topic Dando touched on
was how to approach a coach or an organization leader and what you should expect
when you do so.
“First of all, parents have every right to discuss and
learn the reasons why their kid isn’t getting the playing time they think he
deserves or discuss positions and anything related to the sport and their child,”
Dando said.
“Secondly, it is the responsibility of the coach and/or organization
to give the answers to their questions, but to do so honestly, as the coach
sees it. It is important to tell the
parents the truth and not tell them what they want to hear,” Dando continued. “A
lot of parents are interested in the answer they want, not the truth. Everybody
says that they want the truth, but that is directly related to what they think.
Obviously, there are places where you can go that people will tell you anything
you want to hear. That won’t help any player in any sport in the long run. Some
travel organizations and showcases will tell you want to hear in order to
solicit more money from you. LVBA will give you a truthful evaluation. It may
not be want you want to hear, but if it is truthful, that is all you can ask for.
Organizations should be answering questions honestly and with integrity.”
“And lastly, choosing the right time to approach a coach is
very important,” Dando said. “It is not an appropriate time to approach coaches
before, during or immediately after a game or practice to have a lengthy talk
about your kid with other people present. It is never a good idea to talk
immediately after a game when emotions are still running high for a parent who
has issues. The coach is not paid to have these talks at the field. The proper
protocol is to set up an appointment with the organization.”
