Travel Baseball Is Not Just About Getting What You Want

Travel Baseball Is Not Just About Getting What You Want

Learning self-evaluation and teaching your kid the right life lesson is the best path.

By Steve Smull

of LVBA

Blog Article #1

To be fair, I should not limit this article to just baseball parents. A parent who has kids in any sport often struggles to understand what is happening on the field.

“Why did the coach take my kid out?”

“Why is my kid not playing shortstop?”

“Why is my kid not batting 3^rd or 4^th in the lineup? He has always batted 3^rd or 4^th.”

“Ok, I am going to give that coach a piece of my mind.”

Raise your hands if you have had those thoughts while watching a game.

I will now attempt to help the reader understand how you can help your kid develop to be a better baseball (or basketball, soccer, etc.) player and more importantly, a better person. And I will conclude with how you should approach a coach or organization owner when you have a multitude of questions that you need answered.

I will attempt to help you by passing on a story that Dylan Dando, owner and Director of Baseball Operations at Lehigh Valley Baseball Academy, relayed to me involving his 7-year old daughter playing soccer in a local rec league.

Dando went on to talk about how his daughter was not happy about the amount of playing time she was getting and she wanted him to talk to the coach about getting her more playing time.

Sound familiar?

What is not “familiar” was Dando’s approach to that situation.

Dando explained to his daughter that he was not going to talk to the coach about getting her more playing time. He felt that her only playing half the game was appropriate.

He went on to explain to her that if she wants more playing time, then she should be more focused on what she is doing on the soccer field when she is playing and be more focused on the game when she is sitting. He also explained to her that she needs to practice more at home to improve her soccer skills because he never sees her practicing on her own.

Dando admitted that she is more interested in the social aspect of playing soccer with her friends and that her number one priority with playing soccer (besides socializing) was to have fun.

And there is nothing wrong with that. Let kids be kids.

But Dando was not going to approach the coach about getting his daughter more playing time just because she wanted more playing time.

“No way”, Dando said. “I told her she has to earn her playing time. I would be teaching her the wrong life lesson to go to the coach to get her more playing time just because she wants that and just because I can make that happen for her.”

“And therein lies the problem with parents everywhere,” Dando continued. “A lot of these travel baseball parents teach their kids the wrong lesson by jumping from one travel program to another to another because their kid is not getting enough playing time or not playing the position they want their kid to play or not batting in the spot in the batting order they want their kid to bat.”

“Parents at LVBA forget that I am a parent, too,” Dando said. “I have two kids who play sports and I handle the kids at the academy the same way I handle my two kids. If my kids or the academy kids are not on the field as much as they think they should be, then do something to make yourself better and earn more playing time. Focus more at practice. Do more work at home. Get additional instruction. Do the things you need to do to get better and get on the field more.”

However, parents would rather blame the coach or the organization instead of looking at their kid’s situation honestly.

“Parents just automatically point the finger at the coach or the organization,” Dando said. “Parents don’t even consider the possible reasons their kid is not on the field as much as they think their kid should be. Parents do not ask themselves how they can help improve the situation. They just point the finger at the coach or the organization and often times leave the organization to go somewhere else where they can play more. And that is not the answer.”

“A big problem with the world today is that most people cannot self-evaluate,” Dando said. “They just cannot look into the mirror and admit their mistakes. And most baseball parents are incapable of evaluating their own kids honestly. They are not honest about what they see on the field.”

One of the most important points that I took from the conversation was when Dando said this:

“Sure, LVBA develops players by giving them tons of reps in the infield and outfield, throwing pens, getting thousands of reps in the batting cage and going over situational spots constantly with hitting and fielding, but we also develop the kids to make them better people by teaching them the right life lessons,” Dando said. “And those life lessons include earning your playing time on the field.”

In conclusion, another important topic Dando touched on was how to approach a coach or an organization leader and what you should expect when you do so.

“First of all, parents have every right to discuss and learn the reasons why their kid isn’t getting the playing time they think he deserves or discuss positions and anything related to the sport and their child,” Dando said.

“Secondly, it is the responsibility of the coach and/or organization to give the answers to their questions, but to do so honestly, as the coach sees it.  It is important to tell the parents the truth and not tell them what they want to hear,” Dando continued. “A lot of parents are interested in the answer they want, not the truth. Everybody says that they want the truth, but that is directly related to what they think. Obviously, there are places where you can go that people will tell you anything you want to hear. That won’t help any player in any sport in the long run. Some travel organizations and showcases will tell you want to hear in order to solicit more money from you. LVBA will give you a truthful evaluation. It may not be want you want to hear, but if it is truthful, that is all you can ask for. Organizations should be answering questions honestly and with integrity.”

“And lastly, choosing the right time to approach a coach is very important,” Dando said. “It is not an appropriate time to approach coaches before, during or immediately after a game or practice to have a lengthy talk about your kid with other people present. It is never a good idea to talk immediately after a game when emotions are still running high for a parent who has issues. The coach is not paid to have these talks at the field. The proper protocol is to set up an appointment with the organization.”